Flight

Critique for

Your idea is most definitely evident, and was clear and easy to follow, however the flow is disrupted by incorrect grammar, bad layout and poor formatting. 

Layout and Structure
I appreciate what you're trying to accomplish here with your layout, but it's actually really distracting.
When you play with structure and layout it really needs to enhance the meaning while still being easy to read.
The separation of the words from the primary stanza makes this incredibly difficult to follow. 
The brain processes sentences and paragraphs as units (it's actually pretty amazing) so when you leave large gaps it breaks the meaning and our minds automatically separate the words off to the side.

What I'd suggest doing in this case is find another way to convey the movement of flight... use superscript and subscript (you can do this in the stash writer). Use the alignment buttons to move whole stanzas across the page (keeping each line together) or indent the lines slightly (I mean leave a gap between the margin and the line, creating a ripple effect down the margin.

As for the message down the middle, you can preserve it by simply bolding those words... so the message will still be clear!

Diction & Imagery
Your word choice is quite simple, and whilst this makes it easy to read, it also makes things a little boring. Consider varying your words slightly (use a thesaurus AND a dictionary to do this. This is particularly important for repetitive words: in this case you use 'flying' twice in the space of 6 lines as well as being the title. "Gliding", "soaring" are examples of strong verbs (verbs that convey a specific type of movement) that would enhance the idea of movement in the poem.

There's a lack of concrete imagery in this piece. Although you have a lot of movement, the concepts of the "prison" (for confinement) is vague and the location and feel of flight is not well described. You need to include more sensory details to allow your audience to "feel" your ideas and emotions better. To do this you need to play with connotation a great deal more and this will arise from your use of adjective and nouns. (This will come automatically if you use your thesaurus carefully).

You also have relatively few figures of speech. Although you have the extended personification of the narrator/speaker as a spirit or bird, I cannot find evidence of any other simile, metaphor, hyperbole (that would have gone nicely in this piece), alliteration or assonance. You'll find as soon as you start considering how to include these things, your imagery will automatically become more lively and make your work more interesting to read.

Grammar & Punctuation
Punctuation is not so important to this poem (although clever use of parenthesis might have assisted with your concepts of confinement), the lack of punctuation suits the theme of freedom.

Your syntax though (that's just a fancy word for grammar) is terrible in one place, likely because of the poor formatting, and I'll explain why now:
In your first two lines
It was a beautiful night for                                flying 
To spread my wings and feel the
We are shown we need to read the separated word as part of the overall sentence:
It was a beautiful night for flying to spread my wings...
However in the subsequent lines this separated word is not correctly formatted into the sentence
I wish I could forever                                           and
ever and never stop.
Let's right that out as a sentence to see more clearly:
I wish I could forever and ever and never stop
The double conjunction reads incredibly poorly not to mention that "ever" is an adverb and needs to be situated next to a verb. Here you have written it without it's necessary verb which makes the word redundant and unlinked.

You are quite adapt at writing clearly to a theme, so your primary challenge is to try and include more figures of speech in your writing to make it come alive! Good luck with your future writing endeavours!